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#Jen
As I put on this outfit, getting ready for my first black tie gala since giving birth, I honestly felt so awkward in my body as if I were a faker putting on a costume. I know the feeling of seeing other moms dressed to the nines, looking like they are effortlessly rising above as the rest of us struggle. For me, it's still a struggle. The anxiety of feeling like everyone can see through my disguise to the hyperpigmentation and stretch marks underneath, wondering if I should or shouldn't wear something because I'm a mom, and always thinking about my baby I left back at home with a babysitter is something that I can't just pretend to leave for a night. Sometimes the reality of facing what FEELS right (being in pjs at home) versus what LOOKS right on instagram becomes an internal conflict. In the end I will continue to try, even with the mental battles, so that I can look back and see that this side was still a part of me and I was just in the process of feeling comfortable being her once again. I may not be the perfect instagram model mom but I guess this is just me giving myself permission to feel all the weird facets of this in-between stage knowing I'm not alone 🌤